Jerry Nine

As stated by Congress the purpose of the Packers and Stockyards Act is to assure fair competition and fair trade practices to safeguard farmers and ranchers and to protect consumers and to protect members of the livestock, meat and poultry industries from unfair, deceptive, unjustly discriminatory practices.

I ask you how much would you have to investigate before you realize there are unfair trade practices. They quote Choice and Select beef prices and they ignore that and pay whatever they want or somewhat close to the futures.

Fortunately, for the past six weeks or so, prices on feeders have rebounded and gotten better every week. I heard several feeder buyers say they wonder why we keep giving more for feeders each week when our fats are at $96. The opposite side of the coin is during the first panic for two weeks we sold 800-pound heifers for $85 and fats were at $115. But fats were only $115 because the packers were making $2,000 per head.

At least we are getting more moisture than most people. And evidently there is enough moisture that our packer cows and bulls have gotten definitely higher these past two weeks. We sold one straight barren cow for $87, which has been quite a while since we did that. And our light calf market is very good also. Normally our calf market even off the cow is good in July and August and several of those calves would be carrying quite a bit of baby fat.

God said, “Adam I want you to do something for me.” “Gladly, Lord, what do you want?” God said, “Go down into the valley.” Adam said, “What is a valley?” God explained it to him. Then God said, “Cross the river.” Adam replied, “What is a river?” God explained again then said, “Now go over the hill.” Adam said, “What is a hill?” God explained and said, “Now on the other side of the hill you will find a cave.” Adam said, “What’s a cave?” God explained and then said, “In this cave, you will find a woman.”

Adam said, “What is a woman?” God explained then said, “I want you to reproduce.” Adam said, “How do I do that?” God said under his breath, “Geez.” So he explained it.

So Adam went to the valley across the river over the hill in the cave and he finds the woman. Then five minutes later Adam said, “God, what is a headache?”

This week a cowboy asked me if I knew the difference between a wife and a car battery. Of course, being single, I had no idea. He said, “A car battery is half positive.”

  Editor’s note: Jerry Nine, Woodward, Oklahoma, is a lifetime cattleman who grew up on his family’s ranch near Slapout, Oklahoma.

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