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Getting through life
Problem: I do not know where to start, but maybe it is this down feeling that I have had for so many years. I wonder how people get through life, in a general way? The people around me seem to be fine and, at times, it feels like it is just me. I was happy when I first got married, and we settled down and had a child, but then life seemed to take over and I seemed to get by, but it was just more complicated. I got through the day and could get things done. I took care of our little family and life seemed good. Well we added twins to that scheme of things and it became more complicated. I loved to work and had a career but, with the twins, it was impossible to work and pay day care and get by; so I gave up my career. I don't think I have ever gotten over what I wanted to do with my life. Time has gone by and I feel that life has passed me by. My husband says that the children will be leaving soon and going off on therir own and then there will be more time for me to do what I want to do. I think about what I lost a lot of the time and, somehow, it just makes me feel sad and left out. Our children are teenagers now, and I know the day is coming when I will have to do something different than just sit and dwell on what I missed. I am just wondering if there will be enough of me left over to go and do something for me?
Discussion: Truly, I am not trying to be harsh, but maybe it is time to get over your own pity party and make some plans for your life. Sure, you can sit back and look at all you missed. Or you can say that life is life, as it is, and it is your choice to make of it what you will. What are you willing to do today, to build your life into something for you? Do you really think that sitting and dwelling on what you don't have will bring you something that you want? I believe I have heard it said that the more we think of lack, that the more lack we will have. It may be a generalization to some, but haven't you already experienced feeling like you are missing something or that you gave up something and dwelling on those topics actually made you feel worse? We all have to go through life asking: What do I really want for me? If you raised children and you have the luxury of time, the question is where do I want to go now? The answer rarely, if ever, comes from the pits of where I did not get to go. Life offers and lot of change and opportunities to do many things. When we are young, we want different things. As we age, life offers other opportunities and we have different eyes to see all of that, as we mature. Yes, we change over time, but we do gain experience and life seems to open up and, more or less, reveal so many varied opportunities. Are we up to the challenge is really the question. Raising children equipped you with more skills than you can imagine. You are probably more prepared for life than early on. Perhaps making a list of all of the things that you think you want to do, to see, or be--could be a start! Tip: It takes seeing differently with openness to see what is really unfolding in front of us. 2/4/08 Date: 1/29/08
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