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Choosing your destiny at any ageProblem: I am finding that I have less and less energy as I age. I am not older than the hills but the truth is I just hit the forties. I didn't know it would be such a challenge to get older, but I find that I am not doing this with much acceptance or much grace. It does not help that I keep getting constant reminders that I am now forty. From what I hear you are supposed to fall apart after forty? It is getting harder and harder to laugh off what my younger friends are dishing out. Maybe I am too sensitive to what other people think, but I am beginning to think this whole thing is wearing me out. I am dwelling on a lot of negative things that I never did before. I am seeing lines and some drooping here and there that I did not see before. Should I change friends or am I the one that is confused by all of this? Maybe I am taking this too seriously. I just know I feel pretty down about the whole thing. Discussion: Forty is a great age, thirty is a great age, and any age is a great age if you choose to see it so. You seem to be living on the perceptions of others and looking for flaws in yourself. You are probably being your worst enemy at this time. The absolute truth is that we age, and the other alternative is that we don't get the chance to age. When we age, we change and yes we may see things that we do not like. It is a lot easier to like ourselves first, and be accepting of the changes we go through. It is exhausting to look at yourself with such critical eyes. It is possible that you are contributing to your own stress, with your negative thinking. To grow older with some dignity, at least from my perspective, is to begin to make sense of what we have learned up to this point of our lives. What have been our biggest life lessons? Where do we want to go from here, with what we now know? How do we want to get there with, and with whom? What dreams have we left behind that we might want to pick up again? Is life over at any certain age? Do we keep growing and changing if that is what we choose to do? If life is a beginning with each day, how can we make this day better or put some good out into the world and into ourselves? There are so many questions to be asked and so many things to learn that the process seems never ending. Our choice is to find what we know, not what are others telling us. Do we even know who we are or are we just a product of the opinions of other people? Can we live without the good opinion of others? As I said there are so many questions no matter whether you are a man or woman turning forty. I certainly would encourage that you begin ask yourself some of these questions and let your friends have their opinion and come to your own conclusions about your age and about what that means to you! P.S. I love this quote: Choice not chance determines destiny! This makes me at least ask, what am I choosing? 4/7/08 Date: 4/1/08 Advertisement
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