Thank Heaven she picked him
Friday, September 17, 2004
The phone rang in my room at K-State on a fall afternoon six years ago.
"Sis, I have great news," my sister Joni practically sang into the phone. "Brian and I are getting married in May."
What do you know, miracles do occur, I thought. I knew this guy had to be pretty special in order to A) make my normally serious sister sing like a canary and B) willingly take on her neatnik fanaticism and live with her for the rest of his natural life.
However, in the heartbeat it took her to say that sentence I also realized that our family had changed forever.
No longer would I set five place settings at the table--now we would be six for family meals. My sister wouldn't be a Latzke anymore--she'd take on a new last name and identity. And, most disturbing of all, we, ourselves, had to adjust to a stranger in our midst.
None of us knew this Brian Walker. He was a Montana native and because of time and distance our family had yet to meet him in person. All we had to base our hopes and fears on was a few descriptions from Joni about him and his family, and one phone call to my parents from him to ask for their blessing.
Would this Brian Walker turn tail and run the first chance he had to meet our family in person? Would he accept my brother's gruff nature? Would he laugh at my jokes? Would he pass Mom and Dad's approval?
Would he be willing to work cattle and get dirty when asked?
These were valid questions. Afterall, Joni had a track record of frogs in her quest for a prince, and as a family, we'd dealt with each one's unique attributes. We didn't judge the lazy law student, the irresponsible cowboy, or the prissy businessman. We accepted them as they were because they mattered to Joni. We also took a lot of antacids, but the two shouldn't be construed as to be linked.
Upon hearing Joni's nuptual news, we feared the worst and prayed for the best. We also stocked up on Tums.
Ironically, a committee of Joni's family members charged with creating the perfect husband for her couldn't have come close to Brian. He's Joni's complete opposite, and yet they fit together like two puzzle pieces. It's a perfect partnership that could only have been arranged by a higher power.
Joni's a first-born, Type A personality of rules and neatness. She focuses on making life conform to her sense of order. Brian, however, thrives in an environment of freedom and ease. He molds himself to conform to life. Joni takes herself and her career very seriously, and yet Brian makes her laugh at herself when she's being too serious. He also can talk her out of a bad mood--a feat no one in this lifetime has yet been able to achieve and still keep their appendages.
Most importantly, Brian accepts and welcomes our family of oddballs as his own. He doesn't get unnerved when my mother worries over him. He accepts my brother and me as his new siblings. And, even though he never had a farming experience, he rolled up his sleeves and went to the alfalfa field with my Dad.
We were so happy about the last aspect that we didn't mind it when he blew up the swather on his first round in the field. That just proved to us he was truly one of us.
Five anniversaries later, I can't imagine our family without Brian. He and Joni were there to help Mom and Dad move into their new house in Montana and continue to keep tabs on them. He does the odd carpentry jobs around the house that Dad assigns him without complaint--even adding an artistic touch here and there. He and his family have welcomed us in their home and in their hearts. And, like my biological brother, he's even given me some advice a time or two when I needed it the most.
Brian's such a good brother-in-law that I don't even mind setting an extra place at the family dinner table anymore. Instead, when I lay out that plate and silverware I just thank Heaven Joni picked him.
Afterall, the businessman would have given me an ulcer within the first week.
Jennifer Latzke can be reached by phone at 620-227-1807, or by email at jlatzke@hpj.com.
 
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